Section Four
Mary Sue family gatherings!
The relatives include the Snapes, Potters, Blacks, Weasleys…
The Character’s Family and Connections to Canon Characters
Not hard to avoid points
here—but, if you’ve got one of these, it’s not hard to get lots of points,
either. This section is necessary
in that Mary Sues most often insert themselves in J.K. universe by making
themselves related to canon characters.
While this plot device can be used successfully (look at Tonks), it is extremely
dangerous and can drag the character into the realm of Mary Sue if the author
is not careful. If the character
is not a relative of a canon character, then there are several other clichés
that crop up in the families of Mary Sue-dom and are duly noted here.
1.
Is your character Harry’s long-lost
sibling, twin, half, or otherwise? (+1000)
We don’t care how good your
story is, we don’t care what your plot is, and we don’t care how you’ve
developed your character. We don’t
want to read it. Scrap it now.
2.
Does your character literally
replace Harry as the main focus of the HP universe (Girl-Who-Lived!, etc.)?
(+1000)
See above.
3.
Does your character have a scar like
Harry’s, meaning it links her in any way to the one that gave it to her and/or was
the result of a misfired curse, particularly A.K.? (+1000)
This is dumb. Harry’s scar is a one-of-a-kind, and
was a result of some EXTREMELY unique and unlikely circumstances. Lucius Malfoy’s pathetic little Crucio is not going to give your
character a scar that sends her visions of what he’s having for dinner every
night. And, in the end, this is
usually a device employed to bring about question number two.
4.
Is your character so likeable that
Harry considers her a sister and vice versa? (+500)
This is a convenient plot
device for authors to make their character Harry’s sister without actually
committing the unforgivable sin listed in Question 1. But if people would only stop to think about the Harry as a
character, instead of concentrating on their own, they would realize that Harry
is not the most emotionally open of individuals, and it is incredibly unlikely
that he would do such a thing. Not
only is this plot device hideously sugary, but it also puts Harry horribly OOC
to suit the ends of the author—a definite Mary Sue-ism.
5.
Does anyone else consider her this
too (this applies if a canon character considers her a relative in any capacity)?
(+100)
An extension of the above
question—it is just as annoying when it is any other character.
6.
Does everyone else consider
her this too (again, also applicable if the canon character considers her
family in any way)? (+200)
A further extension—Mary Sues
are famous for having everyone just love
them. Yes, we wish that everyone loved
us and thought we were the greatest thing since sliced bread. No, in reality everyone does not think
this about you—especially those of us who are having to choke down this
sweetness-and-light fic you’re trying to shove down our throats.
7.
Is your character a relative,
sibling, or son/daughter of one of the main and/or well-known canon characters
(and your story is set in the time frame of the HP books)? (+100)
This one is a classic Mary Sue
device. It is used to create the
illusion that she actually belongs in this universe. In reality, it is usually a warning to fanfic readers that
she is nothing but an imposter, a sick and twisted creation of a deranged
mind. While this angle can be used
successfully, it is extremely dangerous
and should only be attempted by professionals. To be on the safe side, never create a character who is a
long lost relative—especially not one of those canon characters who have
already had their families well established in canon. It just won’t work. (The characters specifically listed
above are the ones who seem to attract the most and worst Mary Sues—the higher
the point value, the more common the trait is in MS fiction)
Oh, and by the way, JK herself
has confirmed that Snape currently has no daughter—check here if you don’t
believe us. If he has one, you’re
in violation of canon. Also, they
are more common that we can believe.
Don’t give Snape a daughter.
Oh, and the reason this question is so high with no proviso for giving
Snape a son is that, well, we’ve never actually seen one of those. He’s just given lots of daughters. And they’re all Sues.
8.
Is you character the future child of
any of the canon characters (future meaning set outside the realm of the
written HP universe)? (+50)
This one is a little bit more
tricky—setting fics in the future or finding ways to bring future characters
back into the past is a legitimate plot device, as nothing has been established
past Book VI and that leaves plenty of room for an author to play. However, that lack of restraint also
leaves plenty of room for an author to get ridiculous. Just be careful in using this one—don’t
curse a canon character with a Mary Sue for a daughter! (as above, the
characters listed here are those most likely to attract Mary Sues, with higher
points awarded to those who attract the most and the worst. And the reason Sirius is so high is
because he’s dead. It’s not
canon).
9.
Is your character a descendent of a
well-known and famous individual or an ancient, Pureblood, wealthy family?
(+100)
This is rather…annoying. If your character is an heir or an
heiress, that is usually a means for them to inheirit huge estates and lots of
money. That generally implies that
your character is automatically dead rich and powerful and influential. That is just another angle to make sure
your character somehow becomes rich during the story. The descendent of Godric Gryffindor is used more times than
we care to count, because it is simply a way to show that your character is
über-powerful and rich and somehow connected to Hogwarts. Which also usually makes her think that
gives her a nod to do whatever she wants.
If your character is a descendent or ancestor of Salazar Slytherin,
you’re violating canon. The Heir
of Slytherin has been VERY firmly established, so you may NOT be related to
him. Also, we’ve seen the
descendents of Slytherin. They
were inbred backwater hillbillies.
And that whole Merlin
thing? Don’t do that.
10.
Is your character’s family horrible
and oppressive, but your character is different and rebels out of their
blackness? (+100)
This one is just old—it is the
age-old Cinderella story (which is, if we all face the facts, an MS
itself). All this does is serve as
a vehicle to show how wonderful and brave and good your character is—which, if
your character is a Sue, we’ve already had to hear about from thirteen other
angles.
11.
Does your character’s past include
people tormenting her because of her family, resulting in your character
constantly brooding? (+50)
This one is just
irritating. It is the classic Sue symptom
of having some deep, terrible secret, or some awful past, both of which are
beyond her control. This, of
course, does not stop her from being a total load about it all the time, and/or
showing how brave and strong she is in standing tall in the face of all the
cruelty she endures from the canon characters. This is overused and trite.
12.
Is your character related to
Voldemort? (+200)
Poor Voldie gets his own
section because Sue authors love using him for angst so much, and, as such,
warp the evil bastard terribly out of character. The whole “Voldemort’s sister” angle is ridiculous and
noncanonical. It’s been very
established that he has NO SIBLINGS.
He was an only child, his parents were together for less than a year,
and his mother died an hour after he was born.
The entire “Voldemort’s
daughter” angle is even more ridiculous.
We personally get the impression that all the things Voldemort has done
to himself have completely warped his biological systems. The only reason people make their
characters the daughter of The Most Hated and Feared Dark Wizard of All Time is
so they can endure scorn and hatred and prejudice from all sides for something
that isn’t her fault, and we’ve discussed how bad that is. And Voldemort is trying to make himself
invincible. HE DOES NOT SHARE
POWER. He would not raise someone
to take over his empire for him, because he/she/it could become a potential
threat.
Also, if his son or daughter
showed the SLIGHTEST hint of turning anti-him, he’d kill them without
thought. Please remember—Lord
Voldemort is a VERY EVIL GUY. He’s
sick, twisted, and a total psychopath.
Come on—he killed his father and his grandparents when he was
sixteen. He tortured children and
killed bunny rabbits when he was a little kid. He’s not going to let someone he’s planning to have inherit
his fortune and power rebel against him.
And Voldemort already has
little creations that are helping him take over the world—they’re called Death
Eaters. He doesn’t need Raven
Darkmoon, Balrog of the Underworld, to help him. Dumbledore HIMSELF has said that Voldemort likes to operate
alone. He has his little toadies,
and that is IT.
13.
Is the character’s family always cheerful,
kind and loving and always taking in the canon characters? (+100)
This one is a definite rip
off. J.K.’s universe already has a
family like this—the Weasleys. We
don’t need another one. This will
only result in an entire family of
Sues, in that your created family will most likely supplant the Weasleys—that
old Sue staple of upstaging the canon characters in any capacity is a surefire
sign that your character is a Sue.
14.
Did your character run away from
home because of her family’s penchant for Dark Magic and/or their attitude
towards half-bloods and Muggleborns? (+100)
Here is another point used to
show how good and brave and wonderful and kind your character is—just stop,
already! This is also dry and worn
out. Not to mention yet another
way for your character to do what a canon character has done, but undoubtedly
do it better.
15.
Does your character have abusive
and/or neglectful parent(s)/guardian(s)/spouse? (+100)
This is frowned upon because
it’s yet another vehicle for OC angst, as well as the ever popular “look how
abused and tormented my character was but still remains her strong and
wonderful self” angle. Note—if
your character is constantly whining about any of her problems, she’s not all
that strong, now is she? Just
avoid these.
16.
Did one or both of your character’s
parents/guardians/spouse abandon him/her (this includes suicides)? (+50)
Here is yet another excuse for
the character to be angstful yet strong—which is obviously yet another Mary Sue-ism. Not to mention another rip off from HP
canon, which is also a Mary Sue-ism.
17.
Did one of your character’s
parents/guardians/spouse murder/attempt to murder the other? (+100)
This is usually nothing but a
way for a character to have angst in the form of a crazy parent chasing them,
attempting to give the same treatment they did to their spouse to their son or
daughter. It is also almost
assuredly a way to draw the camera off Harry and his nemesis and onto your
character and her nemesis. We all
know that is a bad thing—try to avoid this angle.
18.
Is one of your character’s
parents/spouse dead? (+100)
This one isn’t so bad, and has
actually been used by JK. Dean
Thomas’s father is dead, killed by Voldemort during his first reign of
terror. Luna Lovegood’s mother was
killed in a magical accident.
However, some authors use this for angst to allow their characters to
bemoan the fact that they were raised by only one parent, and how they saw
their mother or father die. Well,
Luna saw her mother die. She does
not angst about it at all. In
fact, we only heard about at the end of the book. Don’t make your character constantly angst about how awful
everything is for her—that makes her weak, not strong like we know authors are
trying to make their characters.
19.
Is your character an orphan/raised
by people who are not her parents? (+100)
Yet another old, tired way to make
your character suffer needlessly so we can see how brave she is. And another way for your character to
“improve” upon whatever the canon characters do. Harry is the books’ main orphan—not to mention their main
focus (hence the titles). Don’t
make your character draw the attention away from him and on to herself. It defeats the purpose of the universe.
20. Is your character’s family nonexistent? (+50)
This is a common plot hole in
MS fics. The author is so eager to
get to the “meat” of the story in which we hear about how great and wonderful
and magnificent the character is and get to see her defeat Voldemort and market
her own line of hair care products, that he/she just sort of forgets to create
any sort of back story at all for her character. A back-story of some kind is necessary to flesh out the
character—no one just “appears.”
21.
Is the character the adopted
brother/sister or son/daughter or adoptive mother/father of one of the canon
characters? (+100)
Old! This is probably not going to happen any time soon,
okay? J.K’s characters aren’t just
going to start randomly adopting people (who will undoubtedly hold the key to
the downfall of Voldemort). This
is just another random plot device used by countless Sues to make it seem as
though they belong in this universe.
Backward! – Back to TOC – Forward!